Comparisons are inevitable. They are natural. They just happen. Again and again. It can be a double edged sword, which can motivate or demotivate, according to the circumstances. And the examples are plenty and in surplus around us.
As a kid, in India, the life is mainly about academics and the comparisons one has to face during this period is 'incomparably' vast. If you are an achiever, then it’s multiplied by several times. Your parents will compare, your teachers will compare and even your fellow students’ parents also will not miss a chance to compare. The way in which we find a frame of reference for these comparisons is amazing. So, in our cultural setup, where everyone cares (both in positive and negative sense!) for the other or at least it seems so, one can’t avoid comparisons. We even compare our Gods. Most of the times, our religious ‘fights’ are to prove which God is powerful by killing humans and destroying public properties.
How is it in a western oriented culture where individuality reigns supreme? I don’t think the comparisons would be as firm as it happens in our culture. It’s because, since you are not concerned about what other persons achieve, it never disturbs you or you don’t need him/her as a frame of reference to see where you are. So can we conclude that comparisons are a natural outcome of a more of social being than an individual being? I clearly have no answer.
Do comparisons help? I don't know. But, to be honest, I have felt too irritating about comparisons during my life. But, many a time, I came to know about a lot of things around me through comparisons. Again, I don’t know if I have taken them positively anytime. But still, to take a stand, I hate comparisons., because I have found only unhealthy ones prevailing and healthy comparisons are not pursued so keenly. It can even lead to suicides. The core reason for almost 75% of suicides should be because of unwanted comparisons , which should be mainly the inferiority complexes that develop due to them, than just mental issues. I believe, even healthy comparisons can be so dangerous, as there is always one is better than the other.
As a kid, in India, the life is mainly about academics and the comparisons one has to face during this period is 'incomparably' vast. If you are an achiever, then it’s multiplied by several times. Your parents will compare, your teachers will compare and even your fellow students’ parents also will not miss a chance to compare. The way in which we find a frame of reference for these comparisons is amazing. So, in our cultural setup, where everyone cares (both in positive and negative sense!) for the other or at least it seems so, one can’t avoid comparisons. We even compare our Gods. Most of the times, our religious ‘fights’ are to prove which God is powerful by killing humans and destroying public properties.
How is it in a western oriented culture where individuality reigns supreme? I don’t think the comparisons would be as firm as it happens in our culture. It’s because, since you are not concerned about what other persons achieve, it never disturbs you or you don’t need him/her as a frame of reference to see where you are. So can we conclude that comparisons are a natural outcome of a more of social being than an individual being? I clearly have no answer.
Do comparisons help? I don't know. But, to be honest, I have felt too irritating about comparisons during my life. But, many a time, I came to know about a lot of things around me through comparisons. Again, I don’t know if I have taken them positively anytime. But still, to take a stand, I hate comparisons., because I have found only unhealthy ones prevailing and healthy comparisons are not pursued so keenly. It can even lead to suicides. The core reason for almost 75% of suicides should be because of unwanted comparisons , which should be mainly the inferiority complexes that develop due to them, than just mental issues. I believe, even healthy comparisons can be so dangerous, as there is always one is better than the other.
In a corporation or a company, comparisons create huge problems for everyone. A person won’t be happy or satisfied with himself/herself if he/she compares his/her job, the pay, the working conditions, personal possessions like an own house or a car etc., which will most probably result in inferiority complexes and also superiority complexes in a few cases. By the time you realize that you wasted your whole life comparing with others, age will catch up and you end up even more a failure as a loser. It’s tough to separate personal life and professional life. Still, by avoiding comparisons, many can have more positive outlook than they have now in their lives.
Comparisons are natural. But, knowing yourself and your own limits and ambitions, you can avoid them and lead a life with more positive outlook. In a current, fast paced consumerist world, it’s tough. But, avoiding them will promise a fairer and far greater world and better individuals, and thereby, a better society.
2 comments:
'Comparisons' and 'Criticisms' need to be heeded to only if constructive. And our formative years, the influences - whether people or other factors, are crucial in shaping us into people who can take it all in our stride.
Agree with you. But, apart from influences, we always have scope for change.
Post a Comment